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Rebels Dictionary

A dictionary of terms used by the locals. If you feel we have missed any others, please let us know. You know the drill, e-mail us at

Adrian Blake - Having the attention span of a......

Al-James Hannigan - Possessing a particularly large pair of ears and having a propensity for orange vegetables

Albert - The ability to support a team best by not attending matches (See Jinx).

Aldershot - Possessing a large and annoying following despite the fact that the team consistently underachieves.

Amber - A colour that, for some mysterious reason, was mistaken for fluorescent yellow for a few years.

Andy Deaner - The act of attempting a spectacular overhead volley, whilst only succeeding in missing the ball completely, and ending up in a crumpled heap on the floor. Common use: He did an Andy Deaner there!

Aylesbury - Possessing an annoying ability to score at least one more goal than we do.

Berks and Bucks Cup - Two blokes in the away end.

Billericay Town - Having flags of an unbelievable size.

Boreham Wood - The act of signing virtually the entirety of another team's squad, thus consigning yourself to a season of mid-table obscurity.

Canvey Island - Possessing a trumpeter who only knows one tune, and that tune he is unable to play.

Car Park - Area of land where you are in extreme danger of being brained by a golf ball, or an Andy Deaner Shot.

Clock - Target for the less talented of our strikers (see Andy Deaner, Simon Patterson etc.).

Corinthian Casuals - The act of not only being proud to wear pink (see also Dulwich Hamlet), but matching it with brown.

Corner Flag - See Clock.

Dave Rainford - Showing an extreme relutance to make any effort to play the ball whatsoever.

Dave Timothy - Having a hairstyle fashioned from exotic fruit

Dominique Jean Zepherin - The act of totally failing to instill any confidence in your ability to keep goal.

Donkey - See Andy Deaner.

Dulwich Hamlet - The act of being proud to wear pink (see also Corinthian Casuals).

Harlow - Having a ground that holds far too many people.

Harrogate Railway - The ability to loose to an inferior opponent.

Hornchurch - Achieving success through the use of 'loads-a-money' rather than any real talent. (See also Rushden & Diamonds)

Jinx - See Albert

Kenny Dyer - Having a surname that describes your footballing ability perfectly.

Les Cleevley - One who is more likely to attack the opposing fans than he is to save a goal.

Maidenhead - An area of ground more suited to skiing than to football.

Mark Pye - The act of finding mooning amusing, despite being over 12 years of age.

Martyn Deaner - The ability to resign without any apparent loss of control.

Metropolitan Police - The act of having three floodlights.

Nigel - A very loud noise.

Roy Merryweather - The ability to appear to be constantly smiling.

Rushden & Diamonds - Similar to a Hornchurch, only in better surroundings.

Simon Patterson - The act of singularly failing to show the slightest amount of effort whatsoever.

Stag Meadow - Horrible place that became instantly wonderful at the start of the 2003/04 season.

Steve Browne - The act of blaming anyone and everyone for your own failures.

Two Weeks - An elastic period of time with seemingly no limits.

Thurrock - Two blokes and a dog in the away end.

Uxbridge - Having railway sleepers masquerading as a pitch surround.

Wembley - Sounding better than it actually is.

Wexham Park - The promised land.

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